OT: To The Mugger..... - Mercedes-Benz Forum

 
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-27-2009, 06:09 PM Thread Starter
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OT: To The Mugger.....

Posted to Craig's List Personals:

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in
Downtown Savannah , GA the night before last.

Date: 2009-03-23, 3:43 AM EST

I was the guy with the black Burberry jacket that you demanded I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.

I hope you somehow come across this message. I'd like to apologize.



I didn't expect you to crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason that evening, and it wasn't that cold outside. You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for Christmas, and we had just picked up a shoulder holster for it that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh?



It's a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, isn't it? I know it probably wasn't a great deal of fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge flopping about in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse since you also ended up leaving your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. I couldn't have you calling up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug us again.



I took the liberty of calling your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining to her your situation. I also bought myself and four other people in the gas station this morning a tank full of gas on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to one of the homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all of the cash in your wallet.



I threw the wallet in a fancy pink "pimp mobile" parked at the curb after I broke the windshield and side window out and keyed the driver’s side. I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. They'll be on your bill in case you'd like to know which ones. Ma Bell just shut down the line, and I've only had the phone for a little over a day now, so I don't know what's going on with that. I hope they haven't permanently cut off your service.



I could only get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI with it. The FBI guy was really pissed and we had a long chat (I guess while he traced the number).



I'd also like to apologize for not killing you and instead making you walk back home humiliated. I'm hoping that you'll reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might not be so lucky…

- Alex
P.S. Remember this motto...an armed society is a polite society!


Sorry for the OT on this forum, but I thought you guys and gals would get a kick out of this.

"I know you think you understand what you thought you heard me say, but what you thought you heard me say is not necessarily what I meant!"
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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-27-2009, 06:38 PM
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Thats GREAT
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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-27-2009, 06:42 PM
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That must have been the best sight!!

1982 500SL AMG Schwarz (040) Schwarz (231) "Fully Documented"
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-27-2009, 11:49 PM
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I call BS but funny none the less

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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-28-2009, 07:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joeSEC View Post
I call BS but funny none the less
Agreed...After a search of the Savannah GA craigslist site, I was unable to locate anything remotely like this/ However, it could have been removed shortly after being posted...

Either way, funny!!!!

I'm not a real dickhead...but I acted like one in high school.
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-28-2009, 07:57 AM
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It was here but now flagged.

http://savannah.craigslist.org/rnr/982078099.html

Seems to have made it all over the net.

To the Guy Who Mugged Me... : funny

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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-28-2009, 10:30 AM
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I hope it's true but somehow I doubt it.
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 04-28-2009, 10:40 AM
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Read the Best of Craigslist. Some of the posts are a hoot. Some are X rated so don't do it at work.
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