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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 12:29 AM Thread Starter
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The Perfect Movie!

TK, Digums, and yours truly to write, produce, and sell a trendy horror flick. Whaday think? I think it has genuine merit.
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 12:31 AM
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I'd like to preemptively request my money back, please.
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 01:09 AM
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Charlie Brown becomes infected with the X virus.
A new pumpkin patch fertilizer is spread over an ancient Indian burial ground and Chuck is given super powers. His punt is not only valid, removing Lucy's bloated head, but it takes out the Twin Towers Memorial.

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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 04:58 AM
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Tiny, carnivorous aliens take up residence in an unspecified (hence the suspense factor) number of coin return slots in the world's supply of vending machines and pay phones, etc.

Unsuspecting bikini clad blonds, naked redheads who wanted to rinse out their undies in empty laundromats and buffoonish authority figures at coffee dispensers put their fingers in the slots for their change, only to be trapped and inexorably pulled into the machines as they are completely devoured.

You'll laugh as comic relief is provided by the obligatory token black dude who constantly purchases a variety of condoms (which he wears in several of the flick's oral sex scenes) in restrooms using exact change until (here's one of the film's many twists) he wants a splash of 'Polo' to go with his salami casing.

The movie's protagonist, accompanied by Tom Jones as himself (there's precedence for this sort of thing, yanno?), makes it as far into the story as he does only because his sole dollar bill is too wrinkled and torn to be accepted and is spit back at him by every machine he tries.

Until...

The working title is "Hope For Change". I figure it still has legs and it hasn't been copyrighted so why not? Beats "Country First!"

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 07:20 AM
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Sounds like Spare Change.
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 08:05 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Digmenow View Post
Tiny, carnivorous aliens take up residence in an unspecified (hence the suspense factor) number of coin return slots in the world's supply of vending machines and pay phones, etc.

Unsuspecting bikini clad blonds, naked redheads who wanted to rinse out their undies in empty laundromats and buffoonish authority figures at coffee dispensers put their fingers in the slots for their change, only to be trapped and inexorably pulled into the machines as they are completely devoured.

You'll laugh as comic relief is provided by the obligatory token black dude who constantly purchases a variety of condoms (which he wears in several of the flick's oral sex scenes) in restrooms using exact change until (here's one of the film's many twists) he wants a splash of 'Polo' to go with his salami casing.

The movie's protagonist, accompanied by Tom Jones as himself (there's precedence for this sort of thing, yanno?), makes it as far into the story as he does only because his sole dollar bill is too wrinkled and torn to be accepted and is spit back at him by every machine he tries.

Until...

The working title is "Hope For Change". I figure it still has legs and it hasn't been copyrighted so why not? Beats "Country First!"
Can you have the blondes and redheads writhing around for a while before they get devoured? Jim
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 02:17 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JimSmith View Post
Can you have the blondes and redheads writhing around for a while before they get devoured? Jim
That's a given.

D list actress Kathy Griffin will have the first ever amputation/sex/race change to more accurately portray an armless Punjabi fakir who uses his feet for everything and ends up with one foot beside his nose. The acrid aroma acts as a smelling salt, keeping him alert all the way up until his head and foot are simultaneously pulled into the coin slot in the same manner as the melting L.A. Transit supervisor in "Volcano".

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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 02:43 PM Thread Starter
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I cannot bring myself to display for reading a XXX horror flick I have had in my mind for weeks. It would require better than average special effects for the sex related deaths, but given current technology it could be done easily, although fairly expensively for a porn/horror. The mathematical input/intake model does not support the cost of production, although it could likely be a trend setter that would allow the door to open for more less costly versions, hence more profitable ones.
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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 03:04 PM
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Pulp Fiction - best cult flick out there.

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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-14-2009, 03:26 PM
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American Director Jules Dassin revived his career in France and Greece after being blacklisted in the U.S.
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