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post #1 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-12-2009, 10:21 PM Thread Starter
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WWSD?

I'm driving home

(OMG...stop the story! I typed 'homo' instead of 'home'! Freudian? Why not, I ask? OK, carry on.)

tonight and I merge onto 95S from the beltway and this big ass white f250 comes charging up beside me as I'm trying to move over to the lane I need to be in for the Harbor Tunnel. I move one lane to the left and snuggle in behind some little SUV. Meanwhile, Mr. F250 blasts past a couple of lanes to the right and cuts over to the lane beside me. The SUV realizes he needs to be two lanes to the right or he's heading into the wrong tunnel so he nails it and moves on over.

I'm taking all of this in but not thinking anything special when we approach a slower moving vehicle in his lane. He guns it and cuts over in front of me with no signal. I'm still cool. Got NPR jazz playing and all's still right in the world. Then we begin to overtake another car, just as we enter a construction zone. Right where the Tunnel thruway and 95S split, they road is being reworked and a temp, 2 lane chicane with jersey wall edging (no shoulder) has been installed to move traffic around the new roadway.

As he pulls abreast of the vehicle in the right lane, 250 boi taps the brakes. Since I can't see around him, I figure there's traffic in front of him that he is intimidated but the looming jersey walls. Moments later, in the middle of the esses, I see there is no one in front of him and I peg him as an ass who needs to get over himself.

I think to myself, WWSD?

Suddenly the car beside 250 takes an exit and I jump on the chance to shoot by him. Up ahead, there's a bus in the right lane moving at oh, 50 mph or so and as I whip around F man. I slide back into the left lane and hit the gas. F-dude bites hard and follows. I suck him up beside the bus and stab the brakes, trapping him there. He responds with the loser's salute (hi beams) and I'm all like "Whatever" and keep him trapped there at 50.

He gets pissed and passes me on the LEFT SHOULDER! I let him go by and stay reasonably close to his 6 as he catches up to another right laner and slows to a matching speed.

I think to myself, WWSD?

A third lane opens on the right and just as I'm about to pounce, another car up ahead dives into it and slows down. I've still got one car ahead between me and the open road and F 250 is still beside me. The 3rd lane is ending up ahead so I squeeze past slowing car and blast around the guy in front of me.

I figure I'll put F 250 in my pocket by maneuvering past some traffic, leaving some cars in between us as he tries in vain to work the traffic. He ends up stuck in the slower right lane as we enter the tunnel but he's such an ass that HE CHANGES LANES IN THE TUNNEL! I hope they issue camera tickets for that sort of thing.

Now he's back on my ass but he can't change lanes again because there's too much traffic in the slower right lane. As we pull out of the tube, he has to peel off to the right to pay his toll. F250 is gone from my life forever. I take one of the two EZ pass left lanes in an effort to get by the Mazda looking sedan that was driving slowly in front of me in the tunnel. Apparently, this perfectly legal move enrages Mazda man who floors it coming out of the gate but doesn't stay in it like I am doing so I pull ahead.

I think to myself, WWSD?

So I keep it at 85 in a 50 zone and tuck in as I approach my exit in less than a half a mile with 4 cars in front of me and just as many in the left lane. Mazda man pulls alongside fast and then jumps into my lane and onto my exit, ahead of me. As the lane splits in two, I feint left and go right as I slam the door on him.

Again, I catch up to slower traffic just as I am taking my exit but this time, zoom zoom is behind me. We hit 97 south and I never saw him again but there's a Jaguar sedan ahead of me and he's in no hurry.

So I think to myself, WWSD?

What a blast.

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

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post #2 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-12-2009, 10:37 PM
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Chillax. The meatloaf and Tater Tots will still be there, a little luke warm perhaps. but you won't need a lawyer for the vehicular manslaughter charge.

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post #3 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-12-2009, 11:23 PM
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I do that stuff on occasion in N.J.
around here it's business as usual... "me first' syndrome.

usually I'm doing it with the 300D. (daily driver)
which is damn frustrating since I don't have the immediate power.
anticipation is king.
also. I think tortoise and hare thing when I finally "win".
most times I'm left in the dust if we get in the open.
when I'm driving the SL500, it's child's play with almost anyone!

good story though. I identified with it totally.
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post #4 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-12-2009, 11:33 PM
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I am letting more and more people drive for me. How many single digit salutes can one person get in one life? I ask you because this may just be a Ripley moment.
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post #5 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-13-2009, 02:26 AM
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L.A. traffic has too many people with guns driving cars, a bad mix combined with road rage.
A few years back, I was driving a Nissan Pathfinder, and had someone tail gating me in heavy traffic.
I tapped the pedal for brake light not using the brake, and got high beams from the car behind.
A little further on the highway forked into 2, I moved to the right lanes to take the right fork, the other car the left.
I had about a four car wide gap to the car, I heard something like gravel on the side of my car, but didn't think much of it. When I got home, there were 2 little marks in the drivers door just below the glass from a small gun.
I remind myself of this incident every time I am tempted.
Cheers
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post #6 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-13-2009, 03:27 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Teutone View Post
L.A. traffic has too many people with guns driving cars, a bad mix combined with road rage.
A few years back, I was driving a Nissan Pathfinder, and had someone tail gating me in heavy traffic.
I tapped the pedal for brake light not using the brake, and got high beams from the car behind.
A little further on the highway forked into 2, I moved to the right lanes to take the right fork, the other car the left.
I had about a four car wide gap to the car, I heard something like gravel on the side of my car, but didn't think much of it. When I got home, there were 2 little marks in the drivers door just below the glass from a small gun.
I remind myself of this incident every time I am tempted.
Cheers

Damn, no shit?
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post #7 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-13-2009, 08:44 AM
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In Liousiana "Homoiswhereyoumakeit".
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post #8 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-13-2009, 09:35 AM
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I drove the RX7 yesterday and I was a total ass because I could. zoom zoom
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post #9 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-13-2009, 10:15 AM Thread Starter
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Quit stalling and tell the truth.

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

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post #10 of 30 (permalink) Old 02-13-2009, 08:18 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThrillKill View Post
Chillax. The meatloaf and Tater Tots will still be there, a little luke warm perhaps. but you won't need a lawyer for the vehicular manslaughter charge.
It was lasagna. I blame NPR. Whenever I find my temper flaring on the road, there's usually jazz on the radio.

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