That's China for you. They're watching it before you watch it, to see if they need to send someone around and knock your skull in.
Oh dear, someone just knocked on the door, now Q what do i do next;
A. Crap myself
B. Jump out of the window (30th floor)
C. Not answer and switch the lights off.
D. Peep hole in the door no use as it works in reverse in China, they peep in.
E. Supposing it's the wife and she forgot her key
F. Be a man and just open the door (with kinive tucked into rear of trouser strap)
G. Phone the British Embassy? no use as they only respond when someone is dead
Just realised I dont have a knife anymore as I sent them to Von Vorslagggy for his war with Jarkate Expat, holy shit.
Naw, ive decided to sit here and sing the British national anthem at the top of my voice, God save the QUEEN. Its a little like the Scottish mentallity the bag pipes will frighten the shit outa em
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one
- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second ... if there is one
- Winston Churchill, in response.