If you spend any time on the interstates, you've probably seen them. You're cruising along about 10 or so miles above the speed limit when 5 to 15 of them come up from behind you so fast you barely have time to react as they blow by at speeds well in excess of 100 mph, pants around their asses and shirts blowing up their backs.
Then they all slow down and swap lanes, pull wheelies at 75 mph and generally cause more mayhem than an Independence Day Parade full of Shriners for a few minutes. Then they blast off down the highway, leaving you sputtering with a terminal case of "Driver's Tourettes".
Now...I'm not usually one to laugh at the misfortune of others but sometimes, I'll make an exception.
Saturday afternoon, I was driving in to cover the evening shift and was three exits away on the Baltimore Beltway. Traffic was heavy but moving well at about 60 mph but it felt like we should have been going faster. Then I saw them up ahead. There was maybe 10 to 12 of them in "playful mode" and they were jinking and wheelstanding in the heavy traffic, mostly in the fast lane (three lanes wide at that point) and causing the slow down.
Several of them popped up on their back wheels and stood on the seats. Then there was one special guy.
He ripped the throttle and the front of the bike lifted high in the air, maybe 6 car lengths in front of me and one lane over. As he raced forward in an awesome display of manliness, what appeared to be his entire paycheck blew out of his pocket and exploded into a cloud of greenbacks over all three lanes. It took a moment for him to realize it and he damn near dropped the bike as he slammed it back down and shot to the median.
I had the windows up and was by him too fast to cash in but a glance in the rear view mirror showed instant chaos among the onrushing cars. With three solid lanes of traffic blowing by at 60 plus, how far out into the roadway do you suppose he got in an effort to grab his money?
I laughed my ass off. Dumbfucknuckleasswipe.