My penis and testicles shrink to almost child size proportions while exercising - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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post #1 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 02:23 AM Thread Starter
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My penis and testicles shrink to almost child size proportions while exercising

I've recently taken up running, I'm 36. When i return from my run my penis has shrunk to almost child size! My testicles also disappear. This is utterly the most embarrassing thing ever. What can i do about this problem? It's making me depressed.

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post #2 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 02:52 AM
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The law of attraction

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Originally Posted by Nutz 4 Benz View Post
I've recently taken up running, I'm 36. When i return from my run my penis has shrunk to almost child size! My testicles also disappear. This is utterly the most embarrassing thing ever. What can i do about this problem? It's making me depressed.
Create a vision board: Draw a picture of the penis you desire in the sand, take a picture of it, and then post it here. Most will laugh at your expense, but that's not important.

Hurry!
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post #3 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 03:03 AM
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Urgh...that is the most disturbing thing I've heard all morning...but you could try hanging a weight off of it! lol
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post #4 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 03:22 AM
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Have a partner enthusiastically strike the testicles with a large wooden tennis racket at least five times per day. Repeat until swelling overtakes the losses encountered via the shrinkage effect. Nuticle implants may be required.
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post #5 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 04:16 AM
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LOL, it's God's way of stopping your eyes from watering as you run in loose shorts.
If a post-run hot shower doesn't prove restorative, you may have to reconsider your exercise program.

"Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful" - Seneca
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post #6 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 05:52 AM
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Maybe you should exercise your man hood whilst exercising your legs, it could prove to be interesting to say the least

ERIC.

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post #7 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 07:00 AM
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Originally Posted by Nutz 4 Benz View Post
I've recently taken up running, I'm 36. When i return from my run my penis has shrunk to almost child size! My testicles also disappear. This is utterly the most embarrassing thing ever. What can i do about this problem? It's making me depressed.
Yeah I heard concrete will do the same thing.
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post #8 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 07:05 AM
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Yeah I heard concrete will do the same thing.
THE OFFICIAL BWOT DRUNK? There are many competing for that title so be careful.

ERIC.

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- Winston Churchill, in response.
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post #9 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 07:08 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nutz 4 Benz View Post
I've recently taken up running, I'm 36. When i return from my run my penis has shrunk to almost child size! My testicles also disappear. This is utterly the most embarrassing thing ever. What can i do about this problem? It's making me depressed.
Well for your sake I hope it returned to normal. And as for what to do.......Find a different type of exercise to do, that doesn't cause shrinkage.

I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way.
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post #10 of 56 (permalink) Old 06-30-2008, 07:09 AM
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THE OFFICIAL BWOT DRUNK? There are many competing for that title so be careful.
I think that i'm the most qualified for that position. Maybe someone should start a poll and if I'm beaten I will change my sig.
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