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post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:35 PM Thread Starter
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What will the kids think???

An article in the Washington Post today brought up a very interesting question. I mentioned a snippet in another thread but thought it would be interesting to know what you [and your significant other] say when the kids ask what you did when you were teens. Do you 1) tell the truth, 2) lie and make them think you were way superior to all that sex, drugs and rock and roll or 3) wing it and buy them a new iPod to change the subject?

The conversation at dinner with a bunch of us had the entire restaurant wondering what we were howling at. Stories from the past and what we would or could not repeat to kids.

I sent the article to two ex-girlfriends for a giggle and remembrance of a much simpler time. I also noted to one that there was NO mention in the article of airport runways whatsoever.


Maternal Truths
How much about your teenage transgressions should you tell your kids?

By Liza Mundy
Sunday, May 4, 2008; Page W10

SOME MONTHS BACK, I was invited to a party with 20 or so other mothers. It was a wine-and-cheese affair, ladies only: The hostess had evacuated her husband and kids to the mall. Gathered around her dining room table, we talked about our children, and then a few of the women began reminiscing about their own youths, comparing the transgressions they'd committed in their teens and 20s and debating whose were the most egregious.

"I win, I win!" one mother exclaimed. "I was a stripper!"

This contribution came from a woman I have long admired. Smart and good-humored, she has always seemed a veritable supermother, remarkable for her ability to work a full day and come home to direct a range of extracurricular activities for her bright and engaging children. I see them sometimes out for a walk, and always imagine that they are discussing quadratic equations or figuring the velocity of the wind. And now it emerged that, in her salad days, this working mom with a security clearance had removed her clothing, onstage, to the accompaniment of "Pretty Woman."

She and her boyfriend, she told me later, were traveling after graduation, and at one point found themselves broke, sleeping on a friend's floor in New Orleans. An acquaintance was going for an interview at a strip club, and it occurred to my friend that here was an opportunity for some ready income. So she tagged along and was hired. On her first night, nobody told her she was supposed to bring pasties -- though the club required them, it was apparently a BYOP joint -- and the upshot was that she found herself dancing topless while her more experienced colleagues were, nominally, covered. Which was a little unnerving, she remembers, but by then there was no going back. There was a pole, and, in fact, she said, it isn't all that hard to learn to pole-dance.

Laughing, I asked if she would ever tell her children about her short-lived foray into the entertainment business, which ended when she came down with food poisoning the next day. "No, I don't think I'll be telling my kids about that one," she said, although, she added, she would never want to lie.

She probably won't have to. Likely, few children would think to ask their mom if she appeared in her birthday suit, or portions of it, in public, though after this piece runs the women in my little social circle may face some interrogation, and, ladies, I am sorry for that, and good luck to you! But children do ask other, more plausible questions, and it strikes me that sooner or later many mothers of our generation will have some 'splainin' to do. Coming of age, as we did, in the 1970s -- that golden era of basement recreation rooms, Spencer Gifts stores, contraceptive breakthroughs and the discovery that marijuana could be baked into brownies -- many of today's most responsible mothers (and fathers) once engaged in social experimentation that might surprise their offspring. Even if they were not the people naked in the mud at Woodstock, they were probably doing something they are glad wasn't photographed. Ironically, it is these very memories that have turned many of us into hyper-vigilant parents, intent on making sure our children don't get up to the very behaviors our cohort once engaged in with such glee.

"The idea of [my daughter] being so drunk she doesn't know where she is on campus -- I shudder!" one mother, who had just such a memory, told me.

As we pursue the goal of protecting our children from some of our more boneheaded and/or high-risk antics, we face one of the essential dilemmas of parenting: What do children need to know about their parents' pasts, and when do they need to know it?

<much more in the link>

Maternal Truths - washingtonpost.com

McBear,
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post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:39 PM
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My dad lightens up as every year passes, wait until they tell you a story and within reason tell them one of yours. I respect my dad even more when he takes the halo off his head and levels with me once and awhile, makes me feel like he understands what my life is like!

It was a funny and quite nice feeling when my mom told me that she was a crazy girl in college and smoked reefer, she was a good lady!

Yosey Drinks TAB? And likes it?

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post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:45 PM
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You are lucky that you have good things to say about your late mother.
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post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:49 PM
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You are lucky that you have good things to say about your late mother.
Yea, its a good feeling, its been 2 1/2 years now... It blows but instead of shedding tears its just a smile on my face!

Yosey Drinks TAB? And likes it?
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post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:50 PM Thread Starter
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My dad lightens up as every year passes, wait until they tell you a story and within reason tell them one of yours. I respect my dad even more when he takes the halo off his head and levels with me once and awhile, makes me feel like he understands what my life is like!

It was a funny and quite nice feeling when my mom told me that she was a crazy girl in college and smoked reefer, she was a good lady!
Being open is always my take but I am finding that many of my peers that are in their 50s somehow "forgot" what they did in their teens and 20s. I do, however have pictures.

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post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:51 PM Thread Starter
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Yea, its a good feeling, its been 2 1/2 years now... It blows but instead of shedding tears its just a smile on my face!
That is a very hard loss to take at any age. The good memories are the ones that last, however.

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post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:52 PM
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Then post them if you dare!
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post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-05-2008, 10:56 PM
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Then post them if you dare!
agreed

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post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 05-06-2008, 02:00 AM
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Ah yes "college" days ansd nights and pranks and japes.
And our daughter is turned 15
and I was reminding mum what WE got up to at very little older
mum claims to have danced naked on the battlements of Stirling Castle whilst in the OTC, a little embellishment there I hope?
However sex in trains,( among other places ) --- we got a lovely knowing smile from an older lady for that one.
So being a "straight kinda guy" I was divulging a little.
mum "harumphed"
Daughter laughed like a drain
especially when told about the clockwork dancing penis the mum mistook for a "wee duck" in the summer heat of Bisley.
Yes youth is wasted on the young
PS
I asked my mother about the sixties, me being born in 1959
Answer
We were too busy rearing you to have any fun
Ouch
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