Look dude, you want HOT, don't mess with these Arizona pussies. You want hot, move to Houston. It's so hot here, the other day a fish asked me for a glass of water. Last summer, I saw a tree chasing a dog. Not only that, it also rains a lot here, so you actually get to see some green scenery, unlike AZ, which comes in two colors, brown and browner. Not only that, here in Houston you can actually see the air, so you know just what it is you are getting. And the sunsets, well, I'm telling you, there is just something about Methlyine Cloride mixed with benzene that makes those evening sunsets so pretty. And jobs? You want jobs? Let me tell you a story. There was this guy on an airplane looking all upset and nervous, and the guy sitting next to him asked him what was wrong. "I'm being transferred to Houston. I've been reading the local paper there to get an idea of what it's like. I'm terrified. All I read about is horrible, violent crime. I read one story where the police stopped a man and found his business partner's head in his bowling bag. In another, a women drowned her five kids to help her depression while one of her neighbors chased her husband down with her Mercedes and ran over him with their daughter in the car. I'm just a poor New England boy who grew up in a nice small town. I don't know if I can do this."
"There, there", the man sitting next to him said, "I live in Houston, and yes, things like that do happen, but much of it is a terrible egzaggeration, and the media over-hyes all of this stuff. There is much fine culture, and urban living, and the economy is always good and jobs are plentiful, you will simply love it there!"
"Oh, thank you, that makes me feel so much better", the nervous guy said, "tell me, what is that you do for a living there in Houston"?
"Me? Oh, I'm a tail gunner on a Budweiser truck.", he said.
Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.
-President Barack Obama, 1st Inaugural address
Last edited by FeelTheLove; 04-14-2008 at 12:04 PM.