What's wrong with these sponges? - Page 2 - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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post #11 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 05:22 AM
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@ Thrillkill

Two lepers playing cards.One threw in his hand,the other laughed his head off.


@ Cmitch

Earn enough money so that however your taxes are wasted,you don't give a shit.
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post #12 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 06:20 AM
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@ Thrillkill

@ Cmitch

Earn enough money so that however your taxes are wasted,you don't give a shit.
LoL, get it on, bang a gong !
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post #13 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 08:19 AM Thread Starter
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LoL, get it on, bang a gong !
Is a Gong a Chinese whore?

2005 S430 4Matic 'Morton' W220.183 • 722.671 Rest in Peace

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post #14 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 08:33 AM
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Is a Gong a Chinese whore?
If she is then bang the gong anyway. If not then try bangs sister or gongs brother - it depends on your mood

ERIC.

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"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one."
- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.

"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second ... if there is one."
- Winston Churchill, in response.
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post #15 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 08:42 AM
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Why not choose leprosy, instead? You could lay around listening to Patsy Cline 'I fall to pieces' and Kansas 'Dust in the wind' on a continuous loop. A morale booster that would be.
(sing to the tune of the Beatles Yesterday)

Leprosy
I'm not half the man I used to be
All my skin is falling off of me
Oh why did I get leprosy?

Syphilis
It all started with a simple kiss
Now it burns me when I take a piss
Oh why did I get syphilis?

"If spending money you don't have is the height of stupidity, borrowing money to give it away is the height of insanity." -- anon
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post #16 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 09:14 AM
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You're all a bunch of suckers....Saps!
I'm just waiting for the moment when the electricity in my brain malfunctions in such a fashion that one side of my mouth droops in a southernly fashion. Great parking, Government handouts. Hell, I'll claim Progeria if it will net me a Make-A-Wish trip to Knott's Berry Farm.
Just keep an old person around. They come with Handicap tags that can be transferred to whatever vehicle they are riding in, including yours. Their wheelchair gets pushed onto the jetway first and YOU, as their companion passenger gets on with them ahead of all those type A's who are left jostling for position in line behind you. And don't even get me started about how you move to the head of the line at Disney theme parks.

I highly recommend it.

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

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post #17 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 10:00 AM
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^I can play a mean TIMMY!

Last edited by Shane; 12-06-2009 at 09:57 PM.
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post #18 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 10:08 AM
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Originally Posted by ThrillKill View Post
You're all a bunch of suckers....Saps!
I'm just waiting for the moment when the electricity in my brain malfunctions in such a fashion that one side of my mouth droops in a southernly fashion. Great parking, Government handouts. Hell, I'll claim Progeria if it will net me a Make-A-Wish trip to Knott's Berry Farm.
I keep telling my wife what my retirement plan is: If my investments don't work out when I am ready to retire and there is no pension/social security/whatever to support an ex-exotic dancer then I will walk into a bank with a fake gun and claim that I want to rob the place then just sit there for the police to pick me up. I may throw in some drama like attempted hostage taking if the teller is cute or something but in the end I will end up in jail well taken care of for the rest of my life. Think about it, free food, free health and plenty of weights to bulk up in my old age. Sex will be the only issue but who knows if I can get it up by then.
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post #19 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 10:18 AM
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Originally Posted by drewprof View Post

in the end I will end up in jail well taken care of for the rest of my life. Think about it, free food, free health and plenty of weights to bulk up in my old age. Sex will be the only issue but who knows if I can get it up by then.
You won't need to get it up-- ya cellmate, 'tiny' will do the pushin' hun.

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post #20 of 22 (permalink) Old 02-28-2008, 10:35 AM
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You won't need to get it up-- ya cellmate, 'tiny' will do the pushin' hun.
gross! I would be an old man and who would want to tap a saggy bottom?
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