Mr. Penis asks for a raise. - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 02-21-2008, 09:32 AM Thread Starter
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Mr. Penis asks for a raise.

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following

reasons: I do physical labor.I work at great depths.I plunge headfirst

into everything I do.I do not get weekends or public holidays off.I

work in a damp environment.I work in a dark workplace that has poor

ventilation. I work in high temperatures.My work exposes me to

contagious diseases.


P. Niss

The Response

Dear Penis:After assessing your request, and considering the arguments

you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the

following reasons: You do not work 8 hours straight.You fall asleep

after brief work periods.You do not always follow the orders of the

management team.

You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting

other locations. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured

and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace

rather messy at the end of your shift.

You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing

the correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are

65.You are unable to work double shifts.You sometimes leave your

designated work area before you have completed the assigned task. And

if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and

exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags


V. Gina
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 02-21-2008, 09:36 AM
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 02-21-2008, 10:57 AM
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