A letter to the manager... - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-25-2007, 09:19 PM Thread Starter
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A letter to the manager...

These are (allegedly) genuine clips from letters sent to the Council Housing Department in London.

1. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing on it.

2. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.

3. It's the dog mess that I find hard to swallow.

4. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

5. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

6. And their 18-year-old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

7. I wish to report that the tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.

8. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

9. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

10. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.

11. 50% of the wall are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are just plain filthy.

12. I am still having problems with smoke in my drawers.

13. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

14. Will you please send a man to look at my water - it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

15. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

16. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

17. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so please send someone round to do something about it.

18. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

19. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

20. I have had the Clerk of Works down on the floor six times but still I have no satisfaction.

21. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.



beware of fundamentalists

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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-25-2007, 09:41 PM
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10. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.

The best one!

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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-25-2007, 10:06 PM
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I would say No. 6 brings back fond neighborhood memories for some posters here......
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-26-2007, 06:51 AM
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I've got one for you. our first apartment in Florida was a 150 square foot space in a old house in a bad part of town. One day our land lord sent us a letter saying please remove the feline fecies from the rear courtyard of the estate. In laymans terms get the cat shit out of the back yard.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-26-2007, 07:15 AM
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No 2 , there is no pleasing some people
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