George Carlin's Views on Aging - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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George Carlin's Views on Aging

> George Carlin's Views on Aging
> Do you realize that the only time in our lives when
we like to get
> old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years
old, you're so

> excited about aging that you think in fractions.
> "How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're
never thirty-six
> and a half. You're four and a half, going on five!
That's the key
> You get into your teens, now they can't hold you
back. You jump to
> the next number, or even a few ahead.
> "How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be
13, but hey,
> you're gonna b e 16! And then the greatest day of
your life . you
> become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony.YOU
> But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there?
Makes you sound
> like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out.
There's no fun
> now, you're just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong?
What's changed?
> You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40.
Whoa! Put on
> the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know
it, you REACH
> 50 and your dreams are gone.
> But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you
> So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 andMAKE
it to 60
> You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After
that it's a
> day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
> You get into your 80's and every day is a complete
cycle; you HIT
> lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it
doesn't end there.
> Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "IWas JUST
> Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over
100, you become a

> little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"
> May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
> 1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes
age, weight and
> height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is
why you pay
> 2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you
> 3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer,
crafts, music,
> art, stock, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain
idle. "An idle

> mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name
is Alzheimer's.
> 4. Enjoy the simple things.
> 5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp
for breath.
> 6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only person,
> who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be
ALIVE while you
> are alive.
> 7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether
it's family, pets,

> keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your
home is your
> refuge .
> 8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it.
If it is
> unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can
improve, get
> 9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall,
even to the
> next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where
the guilt is.
> 10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at

> Life is not measured by the number of breaths we
take, but by the
> moments that take our breath away.
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