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post #21 of 23 (permalink) Old 05-10-2007, 04:11 AM
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Oldie but goodie

Subject: OUCH!

A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the
Texas plains without water.

His horse has already died of thirst.

He's crawling through the sand, certain that he has
breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden; he
sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards
ahead of him.

He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and
discovers what looks to be an old brief case.

He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no
ordinary genie.

She is wearing an IRS ID badge and a dull gray dress.

There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a
pencil tucked behind one ear.

"Well, cowboy," says the genie... "You know how I
work. You have three wishes."

"I'm not falling for this." said the cowboy. "I'm not
going to trust an IRS genie."

"What do you have to lose? You've got no
transportation, and it looks like you're a goner

The cowboy thinks about this for a minute, and decides
that the genie is right.

"OK, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food
and drink."


The cowboy finds himself in the most beautiful oasis
he has ever seen and he is surrounded with jugs of
wine and platters of delicacies.

"OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish."

"My second wish is that I was rich beyond my wildest


The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests
filled with rare gold coins and precious gems. "OK,
cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make
it a good one!"

After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says...
"I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women
will want and need me."


He turned into a tampon.

The moral of the story:

If the government offers you anything, there's going
to be a string attached
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post #22 of 23 (permalink) Old 05-10-2007, 04:40 AM
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Originally Posted by shrimpton
Cheers Pun jabber - for that detesticle one in particular...
From me too.
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post #23 of 23 (permalink) Old 05-10-2007, 05:01 AM
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Originally Posted by Teutone
You've Come a Long Way Baby
Barbara Walters had done a story on gender roles in Iraq several years before the Gulf War, and she noted then that women customarily walked about 10 feet behind their husbands.

She returned to Iraq recently and observed that the men now walked several yards behind their wives.

Ms. Walters approached one of the women for an explanation. "This is marvelous," she said. "What enabled women here to achieve this reversal of roles?"

The Iraqi woman replied, "Land mines."

So Bush has done something good for the country......
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