Bad Day - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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post #1 of 6 (permalink) Old 12-08-2006, 02:10 AM Thread Starter
Boring Cars...meh!
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Bad Day

While enjoying the walk through the woods in Defiance, Missouri,
a man suddenly sighted another man hugging a tree with his ear
firmly against the tree.

He was curious and wanted to help if the other guy was insane, so he
came close to him and asked, "Just out of curiosity fellow, but what
the heck are you doing hugging the tree?

"I am listening to the natural sweetness of music of the tree," the
other man replied.

"You got to be kidding me, are you?."

"No sir, would you like to give it a try?"

The kind man says, "Well, OK..., let me see." So he wrapped his
arms around the tree and pressed his ear up against it.

The other guy jumped at him with lightning speed and slapped a pair
of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, jewelry, car keys, then stripped
him naked and drove away with his car.

Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy
handcuffed to the tree stark naked, and asked, "What the hell
happened to you?"

He told the guy the whole terrible story about how he got there.

When he finished telling his story, the other guy shook his head in
sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him gently behind the
ear and said, "Cupcake, this just ain't your day..."
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post #2 of 6 (permalink) Old 12-08-2006, 04:32 AM
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Damn, I'd hate to be in that position and have Kamil show up.
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post #3 of 6 (permalink) Old 12-08-2006, 04:42 AM
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Bad day for a drunk

An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset.
Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest episode was another and stayed put. He suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational.
In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window.
A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing, and swinging! his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet.
As the drunk stood there, unsteady on his feet, staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard (barely containing his laughter) who had watched the whole incident walked up and asked, "What the heck is going on here?"
The drunk, still staring down replied: "I think I just beat the shit out of a ghost".
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post #4 of 6 (permalink) Old 12-08-2006, 05:19 AM
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Sorry more Harry .

Harry Flashman was captured by the Indians. The chief tied him to a stake and said that he may have one request. Flashman thinking quickly, least his bowels give away his fear he said that he wanted to talk to his horse one last time. The chief agreed. Old Flash whispered something into the horse's ear. The horse ran off and came back with a naked woman on his back.
"Ahhh, very good choice!" said the chief. "You can use my teepee for the night, we kill you in the morning."
Day came and Flashly was tied up again. He asked the chief for one more request. Once again, the chief agreed. Harry whispered something into his horse's ear again. The house galloped away and came back with two naked women on his back.
"Very good!" said the chief, "One for me and one for you! Okay, we kill you in the morning!"
Night went by and Harry was tied at the stake once more.
"Please, Chief! Plaese I’ll do anything just let me talk to my horse once more!"
"Okay, but no naked woman this time!"
The horse leaned in and Flashman said, "Damn your ears - I said, get me my POSSE!"
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post #5 of 6 (permalink) Old 12-08-2006, 10:22 AM
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post #6 of 6 (permalink) Old 12-08-2006, 05:21 PM
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Originally Posted by DestroyerW140
Damn, I'd hate to be in that position and have Kamil show up.
Don't worry, I'm not a fag....far from it.
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