George W Bush's resume - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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post #1 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 01:53 PM Thread Starter
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George W Bush's resume

George W. Bush
The White House, USA

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:

LAW ENFORCEMENT:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days.
My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.

MILITARY:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL.
I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use.
By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.

COLLEGE:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975.
I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money.
With the help of my father and our right-wing friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:
I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.
I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history.
With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.
I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week.
I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.
I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs
I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history.
My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her. I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President.
I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.
My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.
More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history.
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history.
I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.
I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. history.
I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
I set the record for fewest number of press conferences of any President since the advent of television.
I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period.
After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.
I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world community.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families -- in war time.
In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq, then blamed the lies on our British friends.
I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.
I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.
I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE AND MY PARTY WHEN VOTING IN 2006

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post #2 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 03:47 PM
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ELAU'S Curriculum Vitae .
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post #3 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 05:27 PM
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Oh JEEZ, now you are going to get ChickenHawk's panties in a wad.

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Being smart is knowing the difference, in a sticky situation between a well delivered anecdote and a well delivered antidote - bear.
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post #4 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 07:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elau
George W. Bush
The White House, USA

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:

LAW ENFORCEMENT:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days.
My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.

MILITARY:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL.
I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use.
By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.

COLLEGE:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975.
I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money.
With the help of my father and our right-wing friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:
I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.
I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history.
With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.
I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week.
I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.
I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs
I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history.
My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her. I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President.
I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.
My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.
More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history.
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history.
I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.
I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. history.
I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
I set the record for fewest number of press conferences of any President since the advent of television.
I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period.
After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.
I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world community.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families -- in war time.
In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq, then blamed the lies on our British friends.
I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.
I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.
I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE AND MY PARTY WHEN VOTING IN 2006
Impressive....When can you start?

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post #5 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 10:29 PM
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I thought he killed his girlfriend, drove drunk into the whitehouse, was convicted of drug abuse, etc. etc. OhHHHHH wait a minute that was the Kennedys! BTW, did Clitongue ever release his medical records? The only president ever to refuse! I wonder why? "I didn't inhale" That depends on what your definition of the word "is" is......

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post #6 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 10:32 PM
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Here are some qualifications I think would be good on a Clinton resume. Had to add some more for those of you who've already seen it:


Abuse of Power
Obstruction of Justice
Witness Intimidation
Witness Tampering
Jury Tampering
Malfeasance of Office
Perjury
Subornation of Perjury
Bribery
Treason
Corruption
Coersion
False Swearing
Ethics Violations
Criminal Trespass
Intentional Interference in the Administration of Justice
Misrepresentation
Criminal Contempt of Court
Civil Contempt of Court
Contempt of the American People
High Crimes
Misdemeanors
Deception
Misconduct
Serious Misconduct
Professional Misconduct
Notorious Misconduct
Obstruction of the Judicial Process
Grand Larceny
Extortion
Character Defamation
Blackmail
Substance Abuse
Evidence Suppression
Illegal Foriegn Campaign Funding
Improper Exports of Sensitve Technology
Attempted Intimidation of Prosecutors
Bribery of Cabinent Members
Failure to Investigate Drug Trafficking
Real Estate Fraud
Use of State Police for Personal Purposes
Bribery of State Officials
Exchange of Promotions or Benefits for Sexual Favors
False Reports by Medical Examiners and Others Investigating Suspicious Deaths
Improper Futures Trading
Illegal Use of the Executive Branch
Voter Fraud
Racketeering
Destruction of Evidence
Political Espionage
Money Laundering
Criminal Negligence
RICO Conspiracy
Misuse of Government Files
Desecration of Federal Ethics Laws
Judicial Intimidation
Conflict of Interests
Illegal Campaign Activity
Misuse of Corporate Assets
Ordering Politically Motivated Audits
Ordering Politically Motivated Investigations
Timing of War Influenced by Political Considerations
Misapplying Funds
Criminal Violation of the Privacy Act
Conspiracy to Conceal
Contempt of Congress
Evisceration of the Right to Habeas Corpus
Misuse of Taxpayer Funds
Interfering with a Court Order
Theft of Government Property
Abuse of Taxpayer Financed Travel
Anti-American Espionage
Jeopardizing National Security
Aiding and Abetting Drug Traffic
Aiding and Abetting Organized Crime
Murder by Accessory by Witness Tampering
Murder by Accessory by Forgery
Foreign Influence Peddling
Regular Influence Peddling
Corrupting Public Discourse
Providing False and Misleading Testimony
Interferring with a Custody Case
Kidnapping by Accessory
Sexual Harassment
Sexual Abuse of Employees
Sexual Assault
Statutory Rape
Contributing to the Delinquincy of a Minor
Conduct Unbecoming a President
Squandering the Public Trust

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post #7 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 10:42 PM
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I'm not saying I support Bush and his credentials, but don't express your hate towards someone with this immature slander and degradation.
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post #8 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-01-2006, 10:56 PM
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post #9 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-02-2006, 02:19 AM
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Biased??? Not here...

Last edited by Shane; 12-06-2009 at 09:38 PM.
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post #10 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-02-2006, 07:36 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MercedezGolf
I thought he killed his girlfriend, drove drunk into the whitehouse, was convicted of drug abuse, etc. etc. OhHHHHH wait a minute that was the Kennedys! BTW, did Clitongue ever release his medical records? The only president ever to refuse! I wonder why? "I didn't inhale" That depends on what your definition of the word "is" is......

This guy is definitely Bone Head Doctor. Noone else is so poorly informed and fixated on Clinton. Banned you at MB Shop so now you bring your drivel over here?
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