This is neither anti-Gay, nor Pro Vivisection... - Mercedes-Benz Forum

 
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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-22-2006, 01:48 AM Thread Starter
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This is neither anti-Gay, nor Pro Vivisection...

...It's just a funny!:

Answering Machine at a Mental Hospital
"Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline......

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay ontheline so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred tothe mother ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice willtell you which number to press.
If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you
press, no one will answer.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address,
telephonenumber, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's
maiden name.If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the
beepor before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term
memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All operators are toobusy to talk to you."
If you are menopausal, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down & cry.
Youwon't be crazy forever.
If you are blonde don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-22-2006, 01:52 AM
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If you are driving, step on the brake. You're about to hit someone.


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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-22-2006, 10:47 PM
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You funny shimpy , if you are talking form a shoe phone , step on i t .

Last edited by Von Vorschlag; 09-29-2007 at 03:37 PM.
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-22-2006, 11:27 PM
worst mod in BW history
 
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Missed it by "that" much.

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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-22-2006, 11:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThrillKill
Missed it by "that" much.





HaHahahaha, I sit/slump in awe.







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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-22-2006, 11:55 PM
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Lol Tk
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-23-2006, 12:11 AM
Boring Cars...meh!
 
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Garage
^^^^

http://i30.photobucket.com/albums/c328/nutz4benz/W123/6C3A9CA5-EDFF-4834-8125-34B70B20A676_zpsiyesrawz.jpg
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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-23-2006, 01:29 AM
worst mod in BW history
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nutz 4 Benz
^^^^



Stop stopping my gob!!

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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-23-2006, 01:49 AM
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http://www.sugarjar.com/media/44455/

Kindly press play while watching Charley do his thang.

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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 05-23-2006, 02:34 AM Thread Starter
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...."Or hold - and an operator will be with you shortly, your call is important to us...When I said hold - I mean the line..not your thang..just keep the phone up to your ear...not the whole phone - just the hand bit....Oh Shit!" beep.. beep.. beep.. beep.....(Operator voice aside:..."Jillian...Jilly....Jill Dear....sorry to interrupt.... Ooh..hi Dr Rattle,..nice dress..Why are you both crying - it's not cold in here!. Have either of you seen the Administrator? ..we have a few more communication issues to sort out....")
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