One for the non bleeders! - Mercedes-Benz Forum

 
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post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 03:34 AM Thread Starter
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One for the non bleeders!

Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q. What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q. What's the definition of macho?
A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

Q. Why is divorce so expensive?
A. Because it's worth it.

Q. What is a Yankee?
A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
A. They both like a tight seal.

Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?
A. Their balls are just for decoration.

Q. What is the difference between "ooooooh"and "aaaaaaah"?
A. About three inches.

Q. Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A. For traction in the mud.

Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?
A. The grip.

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A. It's not hard.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Boobs don't have eyes.

Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true
love?
A. The swallow.

Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A. They don't have balls to scratch.

Q.What does Deathrattle have that Jillian secretly aspires to have?.
A. Shaved armpits.

[:)]

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post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 04:05 AM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

Los Angeles girls, quote: 'I used to be conceited, but now I am perfect'.
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post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 05:53 AM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

Quote:
shrimpton - 4/18/2006 5:34 AM

Q.What does Deathrattle have that Jillian secretly aspires to have?.
A. Shaved armpits.

[:)]
Q. What does iNeon and Jillian have that Shrimpton desperately needs to have?

A. Pussies.


[:D]


.
.
.
.

馬鹿は死ななきゃ治らない。

.
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post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 06:41 AM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

raWR!

[:X]
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post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 06:48 AM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

Quote:
Naomilla2.0 - 4/18/2006 12:53 PM

Quote:
shrimpton - 4/18/2006 5:34 AM

Q.What does Deathrattle have that Jillian secretly aspires to have?.
A. Shaved armpits.

[:)]
Q. What does iNeon and Jillian have that Shrimpton desperately needs to have?

A. Pussies.


[:D]
And there was me thinking the answer was going to be 'wit' or 'brains' or 'culture'[|)]


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post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 08:32 AM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

Quote:
deathrattle - 4/18/2006 8:48 AM

Quote:
Naomilla2.0 - 4/18/2006 12:53 PM

Q. What does iNeon and Jillian have that Shrimpton desperately needs to have?

A. Pussies.


[:D]
And there was me thinking the answer was going to be 'wit' or 'brains' or 'culture'[|)]
That goes without saying for Neon and Jilly.

[:)]


.
.
.
.

馬鹿は死ななきゃ治らない。

.
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post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 10:17 AM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

URGENT air drop for the O T Forum .
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Die Krankensalbung
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post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 10:38 AM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

The one three from the end reminded me....


We've all seen the bumper sticker "MEAN PEOPLE SUCK".

I once saw that sticker on the left lower corner of the rear window of a pickup truck.

The lower right corner had an identical sticker (color, size, font) but it said, "NICE PEOPLE SWALLOW."

At least we know that mean people can still do a good thing...and it remains easy to distinguish the nice people. [:D][;)]
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post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-18-2006, 01:46 PM
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RE: One for the non bleeders!

good ones
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