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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-10-2006, 10:52 AM Thread Starter
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Dangerous disease spreads from USA

10 March 2006, 13:27 GMT

Creationism to be in GCSE papers

Creationist theories about how the world was made are to be debated in GCSE science lessons in mainstream secondary schools in England.
The subject has been included in a new syllabus for biology produced by the OCR exam board, due out in September.

Critics say the matter should only be discussed in R.E. because there is a danger of elevating religious theories to the status of scientific ones.

The government insists creationism is not being taught as a subject.

The exam board says students need to understand the background to theories.

Its new "Gateway to Science" curriculum asks pupils to examine how organisms become fossilised.

Teachers are asked to "explain that the fossil record has been interpreted differently over time (e.g. creationist interpretation)".


OCR, one of the three main exam boards in England, said that the syllabus was intended to make students aware of scientific controversy.

A spokesperson for the exam board said candidates needed to understand the social and historical context to scientific ideas both pre and post Darwin's theory of evolution.

"Candidates are asked to discuss why the opponents of Darwinism thought the way they did and how scientific controversies can arise from different ways of interpreting empirical evidence," he said.

"Creationism and 'intelligent design' are not regarded by OCR as scientific theories. They are beliefs that do not lie within scientific understanding."

The area is contentious, with critics claiming that inclusion of creationist or intelligent design theories in science syllabuses unduly elevates them.

James Williams, science course leader at Sussex University's school of education, told the Times Educational Supplement: "This opens a legitimate gate for the inclusion of creationism or intelligent design in science classes as if they were legitimate theories on a par with evolution fact and theory.

"I'm happy for religious theories to be considered in religious education, but not in science where consideration could lead to a false verification of their status as being equal to scientific theories."

The Qualifications and Curriculum Authority, which oversees the development of the national curriculum, in effect guiding exam boards, said discussions of "intelligent design" or "creationism" could take place in science classes.

The National Curriculum Online website says for science at Key Stage 4 (GCSE level): "Students should be taught how scientific controversies can arise from different ways of interpreting empirical evidence (for example Darwin's theory of evolution)."

Classes should also cover "ways in which scientific work may be affected by the context in which it takes place (for example, social, historical, moral, spiritual), and how these contexts may affect whether or not ideas are accepted."

A spokesperson for the Department for Education and Skills said: "Neither creationism nor intelligent design are taught as a subject in schools and are not specified in the science curriculum".

In the United States, there have been court cases over what schools should teach.

Last month scientists there protested against a movement to teach intelligent design - the theory that life is so complex that it must be the work of a supernatural designer.

In December, a judge in Pennsylvania said it was unconstitutional to make teachers feature the concept of intelligent design in science lessons.

In England, the Emmanuel Schools Foundation, sponsored by Christian car dealer Sir Peter Vardy, has been criticised for featuring creationist theories in lessons in the three comprehensives it runs.

Sir Peter has said the schools present both Darwin's evolutionary theory and creationism.

In 2003, he said: "One is a theory, the other is a faith position. It is up to the children."

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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-10-2006, 11:28 AM
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RE: Dangerous disease spreads from USA

Mix through to Potter's front gate. His wife is being interviewed by obvious plainclothes man.
Inspector Mrs Potter - you knew Harold Potter quite well I believe?
Wife Oh yes quite well.
Inspector Yes.
Wife He was my husband.
Inspector Yes. And, er, he never showed any inclination towards being a Scotsman before this happened?
Wife (shocked) No, no, not at all. He was not that sort of person...
Inspector He didn't wear a kilt or play the bagpipes?
Wife No, no.
Inspector He never got drunk at night or bought home black puddings?
Wife No, no. Not at all.
Inspector He didn't have an inadequate brain capacity?
Wife No, no, not at all.
Inspector I see. So by your account Harold Potter was a perfectly ordinary Englishman without any tendency towards being a Scotsman whatsoever?
Wife Absolutely, yes. (suddenly remembering) Mind you he did always watch Dr Finlay on television.
Inspector Ah-hah! ... Well that's it, you see. That's how it starts.
Wife I beg your pardon?
Inspector Well you see Scottishness starts with little things like that, and works up. You see, people don't just turn into a Scotsman for no reason at all... (goes rigid: with Scots accent:) No further questions!

The words are hardly out of his mouth when he turns into a Scotsman and spins round and disappears up road in fast motion. Pan with him. Cut to bus queue: man in a city suit and bowler hat suddenly changes into a Scotsman with beard, twizzles round and speeds out of shot. Cut to street policeman pointing way for woman with a pram. Suddenly he changes into a Scotsman and scuffles out of shot. She looks aghast for a moment and then she too changes into a Scotsman and hurtles off after him. The baby suddenly develops a beard and the pram follows her. Single shot of black jazz musician in cellar blowing a blues sax solo. He changes and whizzes off. Squad of soldiers being drilled. Suddenly they all change into bearded Scotsmen and race off in unison. Pan with them past sign: 'Welsh Guard'.

Quick animated shot of flying saucer disappearing over city skyline.
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-10-2006, 11:34 AM Thread Starter
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RE: Dangerous disease spreads from USA

Forget meds or been chewing 'funny'leaves?[8D]

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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-10-2006, 11:40 AM
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deathrattle - 3/10/2006 2:34 PM

Forget meds or been chewing 'funny'leaves?[8D]

The thought of a bunch of sour-puss Brits suddenly becoming Holy-Joes reminded me of the Blancmange skit by Monty Python.

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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-10-2006, 11:46 AM
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RE: Dangerous disease spreads from USA

Blancmanges playing Tennis

As featured in the Flying Circus TV Show - Episode 7

The cast:

Eric Idle
Graham Chapman
John Cleese
Graham Chapman

The sketch:

Please note that this sketch is a follow on from the Man Turns into Scotsman Sketch

(Cut to commentator in his box at Wimbledon.)

Commentator: Well, here at Wimbledon, it's been a most extraordinary week's tennis. The blancmanges have swept the board, winning match after match. Here are just a few of the results: Billie-Jean King eaten in straight sets, Laver smothered whole after winning the first set, and Poncho Gonzales, serving as well as I've never seen him, with some superb volleys and decisive return volleys off the back hand, was sucked through the net at match point and swallowed whole in just under two minutes. And so, here on the final day, there seems to be no players left to challenge the blancmanges. And this could be their undoing, Dan: as the rules of Wimbledon state quite clearly that there must be at least one human being concerned in the final. (we see a three-foot- high blancmange being shepherded onto a tennis court by a Scotsman) Well the blancmange is coming out onto the pitch now, and (suddenly exalted) there is a human with it It's Angus Podgorny! The plucky little Scottish tailor ... upon whom everything depends. And so it's Podgorny versus blancmange in this first ever Intergalactic Wimbledon!

(Cut to the centre court at Wimbledon or fi we can't get it, number one will do. Blancmange and Podgorny on opposite sides net. Another blancmange sitting in umpire's chair. Blancmange serves... a real sizzling ace. Podgorny, who in any case is quivering with fear, doesn 't see it.)

Commentator's Voice: And it's blancmange to serve and it's a good one.

Blancmange Umpire: Blurb blurble blurb.

Voice Over: Fifteen love.

(Blancmange serves again, and again Podgorny misses hopelessly and pathetically. Collage of speeded-up versions of blancmange sewing and Podgorny missing. Cut to scoreboard:


Cut back to the court. Podgorny is serving and each time he fails to hit the ball altogether.)

Commentator's Voice: And Podgorny fails to even hit the ball ... but this is no surprise as he hasn't hit the ball once throughout this match. So it's 72 match points to the blancmange now... Podgorny prepares to serve again.

(Podgorny fails to serve and we see the scoreboard:)

BLANCMANGE: 6 6 5 40

Commentator's Voice: This is indeed a grim day for the human race, Dan.

(Just as Podgorny is about to serve we see Mr and Mrs Brainsample jump onto the court brandishing forks and spoons and with napkins tucked into their necks.)

Commentator's Voice: But what's this? Two spectators have rushed onto the pitch with spoons and forks... what are they going to do?

(Cut to laboratory.)

Charles: They mean to eat the blancmange.

(The girl pulls herself up from where she was slumped by microscope. He knocks her out again with a sand-filled sock. Cut back to Wimbledon. Mr and Mrs Brainsample chasing blancmange and eating it.)

Commentator's Voice: And they're eating the blancmange ... Yes! The blancmange is leaving the court... it's abandoning the game! This is fantastic!

(Cut to Mr and Mrs Brainsample covered in bits of blancmange and licking their fingers.)

American Voice: Yes it was Mr and Mrs Samuel Brainsample, who, after only a brief and misleadling appearance in the early part of the film, returned to save the Earth ... but why?

Mr Brainsample: Oh, well you see we love blancmanges. My wife makes them.

American Voice: She makes blancmanages that size?

Mr Brainsample: Oh, yes. You see we're from the planet Skyron in the Galaxy of Andromeda, and they're all that size there. We tried to tell you at the beginning of the film but you just panned off us.

(Cut back to Podgorny on court still trying to serve; at last he makes contact and runs backward and forward to receive his own services.)

American Voice: So the world was saved! And Angus Podgomy became the first Scotsman to win Wimbledon... fifteen years later.

(Caption on screen : 'YOU'RE NO FUN ANYMORE')

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