azimuth - 1/21/2006 1:29 PM
bocobod - 1/18/2006 7:24 PM
So...my wife - who has always been a career woman (makes more momey than I do) - has started talking scary. In the past her position has always been that she doesn't have the time and energy for motherhood and always thought babies were loud, dirty little money pits.
Now she's always cuddling every baby she can get her hands on and wondering out loud if she would make a good mother. She hasn't explicitly come out and said she's changed her mind and wants children, but I think it's only a matter of time. [:0]
Now to be honest, I'm not sure if I can handle fatherhood. I know some people say that once they first see their baby, their life changes and suddenly has meaning. I'm thinking of the sleepless nights, the day care, the teenage years, college tuitions...NO MORE SUPERCHARGERS!
I guess I'm being shallow. Someone out there please give me a pep talk about how great parenthood is so I can do something more than break out into hives when my wife brings up the subject officially.
May I belatedly add, If one cannot abandon his/her interests for the sake of another, who, for decades will not fully appreciate the sacrifice-if ever, then no. That person should not have kids. Over the years, this Q has been posed to me several times. My response is consistently, if you have to ask, then no, you are not ready. There is no shame to this, really. Some folks are not wired for unreciprocated sacrifice.
OTOH, after all that is given, after all that is lost, after all that never became because one was engaged in such selflessness as parenthood, when one's gaze is locked with the loving, trusting gaze of his child, the heart swells to fill any perceived void the material world left. It is worth it if you are willing.
In the waning winter years of life, one finds comfort, support and purpose in his progeny and their acheivements. It is at this time when dignity is most delicate and the superficial beauty and flashy bling that lured some away from familial anchorage, will be gone; the void to remain unfilled. There is only one thing more mournful than missed opportunity, that is unfulfilled potential.