Women are like...apples? - Mercedes-Benz Forum

 
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post #1 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-22-2005, 09:31 AM Thread Starter
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Women are like...apples?

I laughed pretty hard at this one...enjoy.

Women are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy............

So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

And.........Men?

Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.
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post #2 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-22-2005, 10:46 AM
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RE: Women are like...apples?

Why are women like snow flakes??


They are all beautiful.
They are all different.
They can all be cold as ice.
But they'll all melt when they land on your face......
[:p]

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post #3 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-22-2005, 11:40 AM
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RE: Women are like...apples?

Yes!
At their centers, they posess a chemical that inhibits the ability of blood to deliver oxygen to the brain.
("Amygdalin" is a cyanogenic glycoside compound which commonly occurs in the seeds or kernels of apples.)

This is true of all apples and many other fruits, though the consumption of granny smith's is known to cause extreme gastric distress....

[V][V]
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post #4 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-22-2005, 11:49 AM
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RE: Women are like...apples?

Quote:
barberhauler - 11/22/2005 12:40 PM

Yes!
At their centers, they posess a chemical that inhibits the ability of blood to deliver oxygen to the brain.
("Amygdalin" is a cyanogenic glycoside compound which commonly occurs in the seeds or kernels of apples.)

This is true of all apples and many other fruits, though the consumption of granny smith's is known to cause extreme gastric distress....

[V][V]
Christie: So, Mi-chelle! What are you up to?

Michele: Actually I invented a special kind of glue.

Christie: Oh really? Well then I'm sure you wouldn't mind giving us a detailed account of how exactly you concocted this miracle glue, would you?

Michele: No. Um, well, ordinarily when you make glue first you need to thermoset your resin and then after it cools you have to mix in a Poxide which is really just a fancy schmancy name for any simple oxygenated adhesive, right? And then I thought maybe, just maybe, you could raise the viscosity by adding a complex glucose derivative during the emulsification process and it turns out I was right.

my favorite movie, ever. EVER.

This signature removed to protect the innocent.
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post #5 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-22-2005, 12:05 PM
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RE: Women are like...apples?

Why are a womens vagina and anus so close together?
So when they get drunk, you can carry them home like a six-pack.

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post #6 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-22-2005, 12:07 PM
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RE: Women are like...apples?

Quote:
ThrillKill - 11/22/2005 12:05 PM

Why are a womens vagina and anus so close together?
So when they get drunk, you can carry them home like a six-pack.
How SHOCKING of you to say.

Freude am fahren!
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post #7 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-22-2005, 05:35 PM
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RE: Women are like...apples?

Quote:
ThrillKill - 11/22/2005 2:05 PM

Why are a womens vagina and anus so close together?
So when they get drunk, you can carry them home like a six-pack.
Also, when one's bleeding, the other is readily available!![;)]
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