Help me get out of work - Mercedes-Benz Forum

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post #1 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:05 AM Thread Starter
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Help me get out of work

I'm calling into work today. I was thinking of telling my boss that I'd rather pluck out my eyelashes while sitting on a red hot poker and listening to Yoko Ono than come into the office and put up with her bs, but I'm pretty sure that'd piss her off. Any suggestions for an excuse?
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post #2 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:12 AM
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RE: Help me get out of work

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Jillian80 - 11/16/2005 8:05 AM
I'm calling into work today. I was thinking of telling my boss that I'd rather pluck out my eyelashes while sitting on a red hot poker and listening to Yoko Ono than come into the office and put up with her bs, but I'm pretty sure that'd piss her off. Any suggestions for an excuse?
There is not short term solution to your problem.
You need to amass as much information on that bitch as possible. Run all checks you can, get a PI, once you find the dead body in her closet, you'll have all the days off you'll ever want (promotions and raises too).
Oh, and when she is no longer of any use, it's time to spill the beans and get her ass fired!

How do you think I'm typing this crap, day, after day, after day, after day...

I feel so miserable without you; its almost like having you here.
-- Stephen Bishop
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post #3 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:12 AM
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RE: Help me get out of work

You got your tongue caught in my zipper [:p]

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post #4 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:13 AM
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RE: Help me get out of work

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ThrillKill - 11/16/2005 8:12 AM
You got your tongue caught in my zipper [:p]
Try again, we all know you can't zip it.

I feel so miserable without you; its almost like having you here.
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post #5 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:17 AM
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RE: Help me get out of work

Tell her you just got home after a long night of washing down Xanax with shooters and beer, and feel it would be irresponsible to show up for work in that condition, tempted though you are.

"If spending money you don't have is the height of stupidity, borrowing money to give it away is the height of insanity." -- anon
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post #6 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:17 AM Thread Starter
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RE: Help me get out of work

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ThrillKill - 11/16/2005 8:12 AM

You got your tongue caught in my zipper [:p]
I told you not to tell anyone! I'm never doing that thing you like so much again.[xx(]
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post #7 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:19 AM Thread Starter
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RE: Help me get out of work

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GermanStar - 11/16/2005 8:17 AM

Tell her you just got home after a long night of washing down Xanax with shooters and beer, and feel it would be irresponsible to show up for work in that condition, tempted though you are.
I've actually done that before. (Not at my current job. They frown on drug use.) I called my boss at a restaurant I used to work for and told him I'd eaten too much acid and was afraid to drive my car. He came and picked me up. [B)]
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post #8 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 07:26 AM
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RE: Help me get out of work

Quote:
tcp_ML500 - 11/16/2005 8:13 AM

Quote:
ThrillKill - 11/16/2005 8:12 AM
You got your tongue caught in my zipper [:p]
Try again, we all know you can't zip it.

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post #9 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 09:25 AM
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RE: Help me get out of work

Quote:
Jillian80 - 11/16/2005 9:05 AM

I'm calling into work today. I was thinking of telling my boss that I'd rather pluck out my eyelashes while sitting on a red hot poker and listening to Yoko Ono than come into the office and put up with her bs, but I'm pretty sure that'd piss her off. Any suggestions for an excuse?
Somebody put ants in your eyes.

Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

-President Barack Obama, 1st Inaugural address
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post #10 of 46 (permalink) Old 11-16-2005, 10:26 AM
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RE: Help me get out of work

Any excuse involving excessive anal leakage should work.
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