Humor: new element - Mercedes-Benz Forum

 
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-11-2005, 01:55 PM Thread Starter
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Humor: new element

A Major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the
heaviest chemical yet known to science. This new element has been
tentatively named "Governmentium."

Governmentium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons,
and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be
detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.

A tiny amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take over four days to
complete when it would normally take less than a second.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of four years; it does not decay but
instead, it undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass
will actually increase over time since each reorganization will cause more
morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate
that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in
concentration. This hypocritical quantity is referred to as "Critical
Morass." You will know it when you see it.
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element
which radiates just as much energy since it has half as many peons but twice
as many morons.

Fuel economy!! whats that??
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-11-2005, 06:09 PM
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RE: Humor: new element

I like it! [:D]

"If spending money you don't have is the height of stupidity, borrowing money to give it away is the height of insanity." -- anon
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-12-2005, 07:52 AM
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RE: Humor: new element

I never knew science could be such fun!!! [:D]

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